Whine whine whine whine

I am getting so depressed so fast, it is totally bi-polar. I cannot believe how much I want to cry right now. Everything is tipping me off. I am so frustrated with how slow I am going and how much I feel like I can't do. Everything is heavy. Everything is difficult. Bending down is a major achievement. Everything is in disaster mode, but it's not, but to me it feels like it is. I am starting to wish for the suburban dream.
I got mad at Emmett for going too slow...obviously, something I can't stand that's happening to me...and begged for his forgiveness.
Thank God Emmett's friend is over and they're having a blast playing, disgusing the otherwise obvious frustration in me.

My sister sent a photo over and in one of them, the way she's looking at her husband, with total adoration (which I commonly see in her eyes for him) is something I'm jealous of...really jealous. I feel that she continues to feel infatuated with her husband.

I'm sorry for blabbing on about this, but this is my real life. This is really it. I am a TOTAL FUCK UP. I'm insatiable. I'm overly moody. I can't handle life's basics.